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The last two weeks of my life have been filled with
an extremely tiring influx of human interaction –
a process that has led me to realise the degree of reliance
I have upon my broadband to keep me connected to what
I see as the ‘real world’ and how utterly
incapable I have become of real-life social networking.
For me, it all began a year ago with a simple email
sent to me from a friend asking me to check out her
“profile”. Intrigued, I followed the web
link and before I knew it I had promptly signed up to
what was about to become the biggest virtual social
phenomena known to man – it was a site called
Facebook.
Like most people, I too started off with four or five
friends, most of whom sadly seemed to be my own family
members, but the list rapidly grew, and it grew, and
grew, and grew. Today, my total ‘friend’s
list’ has exceeded a hundred; something which
is not uncommon to most Facebook users. My fascination
with telling people about every little thing happening
in my life grew, I started adding applications that
would analyse my personality and reveal all, and there
remain no stoned unturned, no question unasked, no fact
kept secret. But, unknown to me, I had subconsciously
slipped into a world of complete revelation and openness.
There remained no mystery about me anymore, the world,
it’s wife, and children knew who I was. I was
being poked, super-poked, “x-d” and then
even “desi-poked” by strange people I had
met randomly, or worse, didn’t even know.
Social networking sites often have this effect on most
people. Indeed, you might even be experiencing it right
now; it becomes a drug, the need for constant attention,
for love, respect and acknowledgment – a trait
inherently familiar to human beings. It had indeed offered
me, a person who already has such little time to share
with others, the opportunity to be a social butterfly.
But cracks quickly emerged when I realised that my Facebook
life had not heightened my social profile, but in real
terms, it had instead reduced it. Friends who would
once meet for lunch or coffee now thought ‘wall
posts’ and ‘virtual hugs’ could equate
to dinner on a Friday night; birthday presents and phone-calls
would be received as ‘igifts’ and an ‘ilike’
song dedications; and the worst one I think had to be
the number of users methodically stalking each others
"profiles" and "friends lists" to
add on people who they were introduced to once for five
minutes ten years ago.
But this week I was obliged to attend a number of social
events which, in effect, forced me to emerge from my
web-cocoon once again, to interact with real people,
to meet, sit, talk and exchange verbal communication
– it was refreshing, but it has equally been one
of the most arduous week’s of my life. Needless
to say, in this day and age, we have become addicted
to instant relationship management; we are so addicted
to these virtual connections to maintain our relationships
that we forget the purpose of building ties in the first
place. We forget that although an x-me hug can be delightful,
it cannot replace the reassurance of a real hug; that
although a wall post can be enough to tell someone you
remember them, it still can’t give the familiar
emotion heard only through voice and tone; and that
although friend’s lists can exceed a hundred,
of those, only one or two are real friends. It just
goes to show, social networking is all well and good,
just so long as you don’t get lost in the luring
white, fibre-optic light of a rather distorted virtual
world.
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